and as she walks
Who am I, that the Lord of all the earth
Would care to know my name
Would care to feel my hurt
Who am I, that the bright and morning Star
Would choose to light the way
For my ever wandering heart
Not because of who I am
But because of what You've done
Not because of what I've done
But because of who You are
I am a flower quickly fading
Here today and gone tomorrow
A wave tossed in the ocean
A vapor in the wind
Still You hear me when I'm calling
Lord, You catch me when I'm falling
And You've told me who I am
I am Yours, I am Yours
Who Am I, that the eyes that see my sin
Would look on me with love
and watch me rise again
Who Am I, that the voice that calmed the sea
Would call out through the rain
And calm the storm in me
Whom shall I fear
Whom shall I fear
I am Yours
the news
Thursday, August 17, 2006
-6:35 PM
I was feeling depressed today. My chemistry is a disaster, and I feel constricted around my Chem teacher. Nothing against her, but she's a kinda drill sergeant, literally. I watch her and think about how she feels about herself, and I wonder how much I really know about myself. And I find that I am actually... A perfectionist. Or a wannabe perfectionist.
Oh dear. Quite worrying, isn't it?
Oh well. I try so hard sometimes, but it just falls apart. And I work so hard with my class, I desperately am trying to address them as I would like to address myself but... I find myself talking to a wall. A few listen, and I am eternally grateful, but the few don't make up the entire class. I don't know what I'd do without God. I'd probably cry everyday.
But I have a comforting mother and great friends. They don't have a clue(
nobody reads my blog anyway, not that I'm complaining) but they really help me a lot. When I sink down into that black and white world, they actually notice and try to pull me up. It is entirely my own fault they hardly succeed. However today, as I said earlier, I was feeling slightly depressed, but it was quite subtle, so only someone
obsessed with me would notice; after school and Chem supplementary, I stayed back with two of my very good friends. To their credit, they laughed at my unfunny jokes, and that's really something. They have no idea how much they perked me up. And me being the anti-guy-social person, actually, with them, conversed with two males!
Amazing.
And apparently one of them enjoys Shakespeare. I am unduly impressed.
It's a good life. I'm really, extremely, outrageously blessed, and I hardly deserve it, I'm afraid. But I will pay my dues. Planning on starting guitar classes again, and this time I will last to the end, and praise God with music. HA.
Have much more personal stuff to say, but this, although sadly unvisited, is still a blog after all. And so, I take my leave.
Til next we meet.
